Do Couples Who Play Together Stay Together?

Imagine this.
You and your partner are laughing, maybe blushing a little, discovering something new together.
No pressure, no expectations, just curiosity.
That spark you’re feeling? Scientists have been studying it, and it turns out couples who play together often do stay together.

Not because of the toy itself but because of what using it together says about your relationship.

The science of shared curiosity

A 2025 paper in the Journal of Sexual Medicine explored what happens when couples introduce sexual devices into their shared routine. The results showed that couples who used toys together reported higher orgasm intensity, stronger arousal, and greater overall satisfaction, without any link to negative mental health outcomes (Sansone et al., 2025).

Meanwhile, a cross-country study from Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, France, and the United Kingdom (Döring & Poeschl, 2024) found something just as interesting. Couples who owned and used toys together scored higher on both sexual and life satisfaction.

Think about that. Same partners, same years together. The difference wasn’t who they were, but what they were willing to explore.

Why it works

Toys aren’t replacements. They’re conversation tools, a language of touch and curiosity that helps couples rediscover one another.

A University of Guelph team found that when couples added a vibrator into their routine, men reported greater awareness of their partner’s pleasure and felt more emotionally connected (Séguin et al., 2016).

That awareness builds trust, and trust builds desire.
Because when you know your partner feels safe, you both relax into authenticity, and that’s where real intimacy starts.

The psychology behind the play

Psychologists often call this “novelty activation.”
Trying something new, even small, lights up dopamine pathways linked to excitement and learning. In relationships, that “newness” translates into attraction and bonding.

So yes, a new toy might sound like a small experiment, but biologically, it’s a mini reset button for connection. That’s why researchers note that couples who prioritize curiosity, not just in sex but in conversation and shared experiences, report longer-lasting satisfaction.

Clinical benefits

A 2024 clinical review on pelvic health found that regular vibrator use improved desire, arousal, orgasm, and satisfaction while supporting blood flow and muscle tone (Dubinskaya et al., 2024).

Although that review focused on women’s health, the takeaway applies to both partners: pleasure is physiology, not taboo.

What the data says

Here’s a snapshot combining classic U.S. data with modern findings to show how normal this really is.

Lifetime vibrator use (U.S. adults 18–60)

• Women: 52.5%

• Men: 44.8%
  (Herbenick et al., 2009; Reece et al., 2009)

Across studies, the trend is consistent. The more couples explore together, the higher their reported satisfaction, both emotionally and sexually.

Relationship Satisfaction and Break-Up Likelihood Among Couples Who Explore Together vs. Those Who Don’t

Data adapted from Döring & Poeschl (2024) and Sansone et al. (2025). Break-up percentages are illustrative correlations based on reported relationship satisfaction trends. Visual by Candy Academy

Women’s lifetime vibrator use (U.S.)

Journal of Sexual Medicine, 2009 (U.S. national survey). Visual by Candy Academy.

In short

When couples choose curiosity over comfort, connection deepens.
When they talk about pleasure without shame, trust grows.
And when they share exploration—whether that’s a new toy, a new idea, or just new honesty—they build the kind of relationship science keeps pointing back to: one that actually lasts.

So, do couples who play together stay together?
According to the evidence, they just might.
And if they don’t, at least they’ll have a lot more fun finding out.

References and studies

1. Sansone A., Mollaioli D., Colonnello E., et al. (2025). Toys in the Bedroom: Use of Sexual Devices in Partnered Sexual Activity Is Associated With Higher Female Orgasmic Intensity, Arousal, and Sexual Satisfaction and Is Not Related to Psychopathologies. Journal of Sexual Medicine.

2. Döring N., Poeschl S. (2024). Do Sex Toys Make Me Satisfied? The Use of Sex Toys in Denmark. Journal of Sex Research.

3. Séguin L.J., Watson L.B., Milhausen R.R., Murray S.H. (2016). The Impact of a Couple’s Vibrator on Men’s Perceptions of Their Partner’s Pleasure and Satisfaction. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy.

4. Dubinskaya A., et al. (2024). The Role of Vibrators in Women’s Pelvic Health. Clinical review summary.

5. Herbenick D., et al. (2009). Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Women in the United States. Journal of Sexual Medicine.

6. Reece M., et al. (2009). Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Men in the United States. Journal of Sexual Medicine.